Journalists, take note! Print journalism can still be saved, with this one exotic culinary suggestion! Change your newspaper or magazine to this format today!

Background:

Print news has unfortunately been dealt a mortal blow by a combination of the Internet and mobile phones.

But there’s still one way to take advantage of the physical nature of printed news—a way that cannot be replicated by news on a phone!

Proposal:

We can bring printed newspapers and promote a healthy lifestyle in news aficionados with this one simple trick:

Instead of printing newspapers on paper, we print the news on a flat, edible substance (as shown in Figure 1).
Then, as you read the news, you can also eat the “newspaper.”
This also saves time at work, since the newspaper could serve as both reading material and lunch.

***Fig. 1:*** *Your daily news could be delivered in a number of different edible forms. The ideal surface must be flat and able to somehow be printed on.*

Material Selection:

Candidate materials:

Matzah (or any other gigantic cracker / biscuit)
Seaweed. Caveat: may be too dark to be easily written on.
Beef jerky
“Fruit Roll-ups”—these have the advantage of also being rollable, as the name implies (like a newspaper).
“Bubble Tape.” Due to the narrowness of Bubble Tape, it may only be suitable for “news ticker”-style updates or 1930s stock ticker info.

PROS: A potentially healthy and efficient way of becoming more news-savvy. Be the first one in your neighborhood to get into the new “edible newspaper” health food craze!

CONS: You would definitely get crumbs everywhere.